Graceful Engagement

Graceful Engagement

But he had to go through Samaria. So he came to a Samaritan city called Sychar, near the plot of ground that Jacob had given to his son Joseph. Jacob’s well was there, and Jesus, tired out by his journey, was sitting by the well. It was about noon.

A Samaritan woman came to draw water, and Jesus said to her, “Give me a drink.” (His disciples had gone to the city to buy food.) The Samaritan woman said to him, “How is it that you, a Jew, ask a drink of me, a woman of Samaria?” (Jews do not share things in common with Samaritans.) Jesus answered her, “If you knew the gift of God and who it is that is saying to you, ‘Give me a drink,’ you would have asked him, and he would have given you living water.” The woman said to him, “Sir, you have no bucket, and the well is deep. Where do you get that living water? Are you greater than our ancestor Jacob, who gave us the well and with his sons and his flocks drank from it?” Jesus said to her, “Everyone who drinks of this water will be thirsty again, but those who drink of the water that I will give them will never be thirsty. The water that I will give will become in them a spring of water gushing up to eternal life.” The woman said to him, “Sir, give me this water, so that I may never be thirsty or have to keep coming here to draw water.”

Jesus said to her, “Go, call your husband, and come back.” The woman answered him, “I have no husband.” Jesus said to her, “You are right in saying, ‘I have no husband,’ for you have had five husbands, and the one you have now is not your husband. What you have said is true!” The woman said to him, “Sir, I see that you are a prophet. Our ancestors worshiped on this mountain, but you say that the place where people must worship is in Jerusalem.” Jesus said to her, “Woman, believe me, the hour is coming when you will worship the Father neither on this mountain nor in Jerusalem. You worship what you do not know; we worship what we know, for salvation is from the Jews. But the hour is coming and is now here when the true worshipers will worship the Father in spirit and truth, for the Father seeks such as these to worship him. God is spirit, and those who worship him must worship in spirit and truth.” The woman said to him, “I know that Messiah is coming” (who is called Christ). “When he comes, he will proclaim all things to us.” Jesus said to her, “I am he, the one who is speaking to you.”

Just then his disciples came. They were astonished that he was speaking with a woman, but no one said, “What do you want?” or, “Why are you speaking with her?” Then the woman left her water jar and went back to the city. She said to the people, “Come and see a man who told me everything I have ever done! He cannot be the Messiah, can he?” They left the city and were on their way to him.
~ John 4:4-30 (NRSVUE)

I have often wondered, why would Jesus even talk to this woman at the well? They have nothing in common. The woman even looks down her nose at him, saying, “How is it that you, a Jew, ask a drink of me, a woman of Samaria?” But the truth is when Jesus looked at the woman that day. He did not see her as a woman or as a Samaritan. When Jesus looked at her that day, he looked through the eyes of grace, and he simply saw a beloved child of God.

Now, was the woman perfect? No. Did she make mistakes and poor choices? Yes. And at first, when she looked at Jesus, did she simply see a Jewish man who society told her to hate and judge because he was different than her and because his people and her people couldn’t agree on where and how to worship? Yes. Well, then, it sounds like the world hasn’t changed much in over two thousand years! Because many of us, whether we know it or not, judge others the instant we meet them. It could be because of the color of their hair, or the color of their eyes, or the color of their skin. It could be because of the clothes they wear or the language that they speak. It could be because of what they do for work, or where they live, or who they love, or these days, the big deciding factor is who they vote for.

But folks, if we are truly going to be people of faith, when we meet someone new, or even when we see a friend or family member that we have known for a long time, it is our job to simply look at the person next to us through eyes of grace and to see them–just like Jesus did at the well in Samaria that day–as a beloved child of God, no matter what they look like or where they live, no matter their language or their sexual orientation, no matter what they do for work or even who they vote for because that person is a human being first. And they are made in the image of God, just like you and I are.

Now, today, with just over a week before the election, you can’t really escape the widespread differences of opinions surrounding political issues, especially if you turn on the news, check your Facebook feed, or talk to another human being. And because of that, the anxiety, worry, and stress levels of most Americans today are out of control. And sadly, many of their behaviors are as well. Now, as most of you know, you will never hear me talk about the polarizing path of politics from this pulpit because, as your pastor, my job is not to divide us over secular views and opinions but to unite us as the Body of Christ and in the spirit of God. And though you will probably all disagree with me, I think it is an amazing gift and a sign of a healthy community that we are the epitome of a purple church, meaning that some of our church family are Republicans, and some are Democrats, and others are somewhere in between.

Now, everyone, please just take a deep breath because I am sure that some of my comments this morning might be making you a little uncomfortable. But friends, I honestly believe from the core of my being that the beauty and the amazing grace that surrounds us here in Oldtown is here because no matter who we vote for or how we understand the world around us. We all gather here together on Sunday morning to worship God. We all gather here together to serve those in need. We all gather here together to pray for peace. We all gather here together to work for justice. We all gather here together to give thanks for the gifts in our lives. And we all gather here together to be filled with hope and inspiration so that each of us might go out into the world, not sharing our judgments and our gossip and our opinions and our hate, but sharing the light of Christ with others.

And the light of Christ, my friends, is not Republican or Democrat. It’s not gay or straight. It’s not rich or poor, old or young. The light of Christ is all about grace. It’s not about earning something or deserving something. It’s about being forgiven when you make a mistake. It’s about being given a second chance, and a third chance, and a fourth chance, and as many chances as you need. It’s about being reminded that you are worthy, that you are enough, and most importantly, that you are loved unconditionally, just the way you are.

Friends, as I said just a few moments ago, I do not talk politics from this pulpit, but behavior, and the way we treat our neighbor, whoever our neighbor might be–that is my cup of tea. So today, I want to talk with you about something called Graceful Engagement. Graceful Engagement is what Jesus shared with the woman at the well that day. It is a way of sharing holy conversation even when we are different from one another and don’t agree on things. But it is remembering that we are all beloved children of God. You see, throughout scripture, Jesus engaged everyone with whom he ministered with a deep sense of God’s grace. He was humble, often curious, not assuming that he knew everything but asking questions and, most importantly, listening. Jesus models for us a form of discipleship and a way of life that is grounded in a sense of welcome, inclusion, and celebration, remembering that each person is a beloved child of God, no matter what, and deserves to be treated with grace.

Now, that being said, Jesus did not always agree with everyone. He didn’t always approve of the decisions that people made, the things people said, the way that the government worked, or the laws that were on the books, but you never hear Jesus arguing or debating. You never hear Jesus forcing his opinions on others, and you never hear Jesus excluding or outwardly condemning those with whom he disagreed, except for maybe the day that he cleansed the temple, but we all have tough days sometimes, and Jesus was fully human and fully divine!

Jesus was humble and compassionate, and he listened more than he spoke, trying to understand other people’s beliefs and understanding even if they were different than his own. He asked questions. He challenged people. He met people where they were, not where he wanted them to be, and he tried his best to build relationships and a sense of community.

Folks, Graceful Engagement is not about rainbows, lollipops, unicorns, and getting everyone to agree and live happily ever after. No, it’s about engaging in true conversation, not coming to the table with a list of absolutes or a bunch of worn-out, hurtful, and empty phrases and comments. It’s not about changing someone else’s opinion and pulling them over to your side, but it’s about listening with an open heart and an open mind, experiencing the presence of God in the person next to you, and better understanding their story.

I often hear people say, “I just don’t understand how anyone could vote for…” and you can fill in the blank. Folks, if you don’t understand, then don’t judge and hate. Instead, be curious, ask questions, and invite your neighbor, whoever your neighbor might be, into a sacred conversation or a graceful engagement because it’s then and only then that we might begin to understand, to work together, and to experience a world of peace.

So, brothers and sisters in Christ, as you go out into your busy week ahead, and you find yourself filled with anxiety, worry, judgment, and even hate, take a deep breath and let go of your need to be on the defense. Remember that your neighbor is not your enemy, even if they vote differently than you do. They are a child of God, just like you. They just might look at the world around them a little differently than you do. But you know what, they have opinions as to what it important just like you do. They want what’s best for our country, just like you do. They are passionate, just like you are. And they have a story to tell, just like you do. So put the hate and the hurt away and reach out with a true sense of grace.

Friends, when you listen with an open heart and an open mind, not trying to win, or to control the conversation but just to listen, you might find out that you have more in common than you think you do. And you just might find that, through your sacred conversation, you are able to share the light of Christ with each other even in the midst of your differences.

My friends, may it be so. Thanks be to God, Amen!

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